My Perfect Storm

I joined the Naval Reserve in 1954, while still in High School. It assured me of being in the Navy if I were called up in the draft for the Korean War. I completed boot camp that summer, and Radar school the next summer. I was ready to start my training as a Radarman, on a real Navy ship. I had no idea what adventures lay ahead for me that summer when I shipped out on the Willett.

After you read this account there is now an update to this writing with more information.

Destroyer Escort

USS Kenneth M. Willett (DE-354) in (1956). She was built in 1944, 300 feet long, 37 feet wide, and mounted 2 x 5-inch/38 dual purpose guns, as well as 2 x twin 40mm guns, and 10 x single 20mm guns. Her main duty was escort for fleets of merchant or naval war vessels. Guarding them from submarine attacks with her 2 x depth charge racks, 8 x depth charge projectors, and 1 x Hedgehog (24 bombs). But to me she was just a training ship on a training cruise in the Caribbean Sea.

It was a hot June morning when the Willett made its way down the Mississippi river from the New Orleans Naval Station to the Gulf. We were scheduled for two weeks of training with a short stop at one of the ports in Central America. We also visited Dry Tortugas for a couple of hours on the way.

The ship was on a war time training schedule. There were drills going on every day and some nights. General quarters or “Battle Stations” were sounded at least once a day. Along with gunnery practice, chasing imaginary submarines and plotting zig-zag courses.

Myself and another reservist, I didn’t know, were the only ones in radar training. There were two seasoned radarmen to train us. The watch schedule was 4 hours on, and 4 hours off. We were trained separately except for the “dog” watch which was 12midnight to 4am, when we were put together by ourselves. I can understand why the regulars didn’t want to do that watch.

Besides radar we learned to plot courses, run the DRT, fire control radar, fathometer, and read charts. The days were full of things to learn and not much time for sleeping and eating. But I loved the schedule, I felt important learning all these things.

The days passed quickly and we soon reached our Central America port to do some sight-seeing and stretching our legs for the day. It was fun, but not long enough. Again on the ship we started back to New Orleans, to do more training along the way.

Two days out, during the dog watch, I was manning the radar while the other reservist was reading a manual. It was a boring night, with no “blips” on the screen to chart, just empty ocean all around us. I started to play with the controls on the radar and switched the search range out to two hundred miles. On the left upper quadrant was the largest blip I had ever seen. I showed it to my partner, and we started to wonder out-loud what it could be when the OD (Officer of the Deck) walked over and asked us what was going on. Not being able to tell him, he ordered us to go wake the Chief Radarman to come take a look at the large blip slowly becoming larger.

When the Chief arrived, he peered over my shoulder at the screen, his face became an ashen white when he remarked: “Oh my God.” He asked me the ETA of the blip, to which I said “about 40 minutes.” He quickly turned to the OD and said “that is a Hurricane bearing down on us, I recommend going the General Quarters, Sir.” The OD asked him to wake the Captain, then stepped to the ship’s loud speaker.

“General Quarters, General Quarters, man your battle stations, man your battle stations, this is not a drill, this is not a drill.” All hell broke loose.

The next few minutes were controlled chaos. All water-tight doors and hatches were shut then locked down. All boilers were put on line. After steerage was activated. Damage control teams were alerted. All guns were loaded and locked, the crews looking for a target. The captain announced the approaching hurricane, told the gun crews to empty their weapons into the ocean and, if they were not in a protected mount, to get below deck. In less than 15 minutes the ship was ready to do battle with the storm.

Radar is no good in a storm where the ship is rolling and plunging up and down. Myself and the other radarman where ordered to report to the bridge for lookout duty. We were given full-length rain gear and hats, then tied with rope to the railing on the bridge. I was the port lookout and he the starboard lookout. The bridge was covered except for the far ends which were partially open to the sea. Sometimes called the flying bridge. I could see the full length of the ship on the port (left) side. My job was to locate and report any ships that were within eyesight. I was then tied in place for safety. When they tied me to the railing (stanchion) I was given a large knife in a holster. This was to be used to cut myself free in case the ship capsized. A frightening thought.

On the bridge were six of us. The captain who manned the ship’s radio; the helmsman, a career navy man; a backup helmsman, another old salt; a communications officer; and us two neophyte lookouts. From my position I could hear the radio communications, and the orders being sent and received on the bridge. This was somewhat of a mixed blessing, I knew what was going on, but some of the things I heard were not pleasant to my ears.

With all boilers on line and full speed ahead the ship was turned into the direction of the hurricane. The fastest way out of a storm is straight through it. There was no course to take, only to keep the bow of the ship headed straight into the waves coming at us. To get broadsided by a big wave would mean going over, then under.

The wind was becoming stronger and the waves higher as I watch intently for other ships. Soon the wind was howling, and the waves growing larger by the minute. Ten, twenty, thirty, even forty-foot waves were washing over and crashing down on the Willett. This was just the beginning of the perfect storm. The worst was yet to come.

As the waves became larger, I saw the other lookout untie himself and run below deck. I don’t know if he was ever disciplined for deserting his post or not. The first main concern was flooding. The waves now fifty-feet high were sending large amounts of water into the ship. The air vents, stacks, and uncovered stairwells were being flooded with water making its way into the bilges of the ship. I heard the bilge pumps start earlier, but they were not pumping enough water, there was more water coming in than being pumped out. I was listening to the communications from damage control. The helmsman yelled “use the fire hose pumps.” The pumps used to fight fight fires onboard the ship were put into action pumping water overboard through the fire hoses. This stabilized the amount of water in the bilges, for now.

The Captain was radioing our position to the Coastguard every five minutes, so if we capsized they would know where to look. I heard the Coastguard radio back to ask if we could help another ship floundering about 15 miles from our position. Our Captain yelled into the microphone: “hell no, I can’t help myself.” Then he turned his eyes upward and said: “God help us through this,” something he would say over and over through the duration of the storm. At this time in my life I was agnostic, but praying like a preacher, it was the common thing to do that night for all.

Being a lookout was impossible, I was staring into the oncoming wave one moment, the total blackness of the sky the next moment. If there were anything in between I couldn’t recognize it. The ship would plunge into a wave, roll and wallow down into the trough and then slowly rise up again to plunge into the next wave. The maximum number was 35 degrees, if the ship rolled as much as 35 degrees it would capsize. I could watch a roll meter close to me, I could see we were taking 25 degree rolls regularly with an occasional 30 degree roll. The time between when the ship rolled, to the time it righted itself seemed endless. It was a breathless time, a time for intense faith.

The waves, now sixty-feet high, were causing havoc below deck in the crews quarters. The heavy rolling of the ship was throwing sailors off their racks (bunks) into the bulkheads and onto the steel deck. The injuries were mounting. Those that could were using sheets, rope, anything they could find to tie themselves into the racks, or onto pipes running through the quarters. Most of the sailors were seasick by now, and the decks of the crew’s quarters was awash with vomit.

I heard a loud crack, like an explosion. I turned just in time to see a wave of water crush our motor whale boat.

Motor Whale Boat

The motor whale boat can be seen amidships hanging from the davits in the full picture of the Willett. It was used to take officers and crew ashore when docks were unavailable.

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© 2009 – 2010, Lekatt. All rights reserved.

Reversed Thoughts

One of the things I learned from my near death experience was to reverse my thinking. All my life I believed in certain “truths” that were now reversed by my near death experience. My experience left me changed in my understanding of relationships with others. My thoughts are now known to be powerfully important, after once being of little consequence to me. Forgiving was a gift I gave to those who offended me, now it has become a gift I give to myself. The same with non-judging others.

I understand Love is unconditional, or it isn’t love, but before my experience I thought love came in different forms, and degrees, because my knowledge of love was deficient. So many things have I learned. I learned about reverberating emotions. How they go from myself to others where they can cause a reaction of the same emotion. Then these reactive emotions spread out like waves of water from a dropped pebble. Angry emotions from one person can infect an entire crowd with anger. Causing them to act in ways they would not think of individually. However, it only works with those in the crowd holding anger within themselves. There are always those who remain unaffected, who hold no anger within themselves.

Do you know what emotions you hold within yourself? Are you angry with someone or something, can’t get it out of your mind. Give yourself a gift and forgive, both yourself and the object of your anger. Anger, like acid, eats away at you all the time you hold it within yourself. Let it go with forgiveness and feel better. Get on with your life.

Learn to hold love within yourself, and turn anger aside with a soft voice filled with love and caring. Practice being kind, caring, and compassionate. You will personally feel better for it. You will find peace, and joy in holding love within yourself to share with others.

© 2009, Lekatt. All rights reserved.

Communities

After my near death experience, I read a lot of books, went to seminars, and watched documentaries on anything that remotely resembled what I had experienced. I had a thirst for knowledge of spiritual things. In the end it took me over three years to integrate my near death experience into daily living. I had to learn how to live in the physical without becoming of the physical, not an easy task.

During this search for knowledge I attended a pre-seminar presentation on EST (Erhard Seminars Training.) My boss wanted me to see if the seminar might help his employees to work together better as a team.

I arrived barely in time and found an aisle seat close to the front just in time for the opening of the presentation. The presenter started by talking about the different communities represented in the room. Some of the ones he mentioned were the Medical community, the Business community, the Professional community, and others. I was a representative of the Medical community. Then he asked if anyone had been missed, would they hold up their hand. The person sitting next to me held up their hand, and when asked, stated they were a member of the Gay community. He acknowledged this person and several others before continuing. He then asked each person to turn to the one sitting next to them and introduce themselves, stating why they had come to the meeting.

When I turned, I saw a young girl wearing a black leather vest. The vest had two small chains holding it together over a red, sleeveless blouse. She also wore a red head band, and sported a tattoo on her arm of a naked woman. She could have been a biker, as I remembered, but turned out to be something totally different.

She quickly told me her name was Jill, and that she was a member of the Gay community. Her voice was soft and clear, with a command of words, showing me she was a well-educated young woman. She had attended the meeting to find some peace within herself. After I exchanged my particulars, the meeting was forgotten, and slowly faded away into the background as she answered a few of my questions.

She had known she was gay from as far back as she could remember. Attempts to ignore the emotions proved futile, however much she tried. She felt alone, isolated from others, with different feelings, emotions, and perception. I provided her with a non-judging person to talk to, and she poured out her heart, along with all the hurts of her young life.

She was 16 when her parents discovered she was gay and asked her to pack-up and leave. They wanted no part of a gay child. I can’t even imagine how that would feel, losing the emotional and financial support of your parents, just when you needed them the most. A friend took her in so she could finish school. Being an honor student her whole life, she knew the importance of learning. The conversation, in whispered words, was so revealing she was literally in tears as she recalled those hard years of her life.

She had worked part-time to help support herself during those years, and finally went to a culinary school and earned a culinary degree. She was currently working as a woman chef in an up-scale restaurant.

The Gay community was the only place she felt safe, as if she belonged to something. All she wanted was for others to accept her for what she was, the same thing most people want. I told her about near death experiences, and the love and acceptance God gives to all His children. It doesn’t matter who you are, or what you have done, you are loved for being you, nothing else is more important than God’s love for His children.

The meeting ended too soon, and people were getting up to leave. As we stood up Jill gave me a big hug, and thanked me. She was a young, frightened, little girl living in a world she couldn’t understand. Much like everyone else I have met, including myself. I can not tell you a thing about the meeting beyond the opening statements, but I felt refreshed, full of peace, and joy, and I know Jill felt the same way. It was an incredible evening.

Later, when I became a volunteer at a Hospice, listening to others became very important. I spent many an hour listening quietly to people talk about their lives, fortunes and misfortunes. It is a wonderful way to learn about life. Listen, non-judgmentally to others, and in the process you also will learn and be blessed.

There is no higher calling than to help others in their time of need. Be kind to everyone you meet, show compassion, and heal with your words. Keep the joy, and music of love in your heart, always.

____________

“Music does bring people together. It allows us to experience the same emotions. People everywhere are the same in heart and spirit. No matter what language we speak, what color we are, the form of our politics or the expression of our love and our faith, music proves: We are the same.” — John Denver

© 2009, Lekatt. All rights reserved.

Hometown Suicides

I live in Tulsa, Oklahoma, and what I saw in today’s paper saddened me. The suicide rates are up 12% percent from just five years ago. There were 119 people that killed themselves in my hometown last year, and 578 committed suicide in my state in the same period. Suicide rates are twice the rate of homicides in Oklahoma.

Oklahoma is just a small state. In 2005 nationwide there were 32,637 suicides. Most of these deaths were young men. Most of the young man were plagued with depression.

What is going on, why are the suicide rates increasing? The paper called it the “Hidden Epidemic.” The suicide rate has tripled nationally in the last 30 years.

I doubt there is just one reason for it. I can see the pressure being put on young people in school to achieve far beyond what I experienced. Why? Why is all this necessary, people are individuals, they learn at different rates, humans just don’t fit into the “one schedule, one method for everyone” routine offered in most schools and businesses.

Churches are losing attendance, holding onto ancient doctrines that no longer work with the better educated young people. Science has become materialistic, or naturalistic, teaching spiritual things are nonsense, and mythology according to many scientists.

Where will the young turn to find meaning and purpose for their lives. How will they cope with the vicissitudes of today’s modern life styles. It is time to start addressing some of these problems in earnest.

I know some of them are finding meaning and purpose in near death experiences. A spirituality without religion. Millions of people have had near death experiences and have been changed for the better. Just reading near death experiences have helped many more. There is meaning and purpose to life, we are eternal beings and will live after the death of our bodies, these things we have learned from NDEs, and the research on them.

There is hope for the future for everyone.

© 2009, Lekatt. All rights reserved.

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