This is what life is all about. The two quotes below sum up "in a nut shell" how reality works, both in the physical and the spiritual. When we see the truth of them, we begin to growth. Maturity is learning to love ourselves and all others. In desiring, and giving, only the best to others, we give the best to ourselves. That is how it works. "As you sow, so shall you reap."
"I am responsible for what I see. I choose the feelings I experience, and I decide upon the goal I would achieve. And everything that seems to happen to me I ask for, and I receive as I have asked."
A Course In Miracles, Foundation for Peace.
"There is nothing in your exterior experience that you did not originate within yourself. Interactions with others do occur, yet none occur what you do not attract or draw to you by your thoughts, feelings, attitudes or emotions. In your terms this applies both before, during and after physical life. In a most miraculous fashion you are given the gift of creating your own experiences.
"Do not personally give any more conscious consideration to events that you do not want to happen. Any such concentration, to whatever degree, ties you in with those probabilities, so concentrate upon what you want, and as far as public events are concerned, take it for granted that sometimes even men are wiser than they know.
"One: I will approve of myself, my characteristics, my abilities, my likes and dislikes, my inclinations and disinclinations, realizing that these form my unique individuality. They are given me for a reason.
"Two: I will approve of and rejoice in my accomplishments, and I will be as vigorous in listing these -- as rigorous in remembering them -- as I have ever been in remembering and enumerating my failures or lacks of accomplishment.
"Three: I will remember the creative framework of existence, in which I have my being. Therefore the possibilities, potentials, seeming miracles, and joyful spontaneity of spirituality will be in my mind, so that the doors to creative living are open.
"Four: I will realize that the future is a probability. In terms of ordinary experience, nothing exists there yet. It is virgin territory, planted by my feelings and thoughts in the present. Therefore I will plant accomplishments and successes, and I will do this by remembering that nothing can exist in the future that I do not want to be there."
By Seth as given to Jane Roberts.