A Near Death Experience, No. 129.

RN has NDE.

When I was 41 years old and a mother of 4 small children, I was in liver and kidney failure and had been a patient for 2 months in Presbyterian Hospital, Pittsburgh Pa.

I had a sudden lethal gastric hemorrhage requiring 12 units of blood . This happened in a small bathroom beside my bed and the other patient in my room (near the window) immediately used her call light.

As the nurses helped me into my bed, I suddenly experienced a penetrating blinding white light in my eyesight and I asked someone to "turn off the light" -- (please) -- or to "close the windows." I had undescribable pain through out my entire body -- it seemed unbearable and I was moaning and shivering.

Next I remember feeling "heavy medical equipment" on my body and the activity of many people around me. I heard someone say "60?" "30?" and immediately I felt that I was becoming "numb" and "cool." I pressed my fingers against the side of my leg under the covers -- and "yes" -- I had no feeling!!

The next moment I felt that I was traveling feet first, at a very high rate of speed, down a never ending hallway. I raised my head a few times and it seemed that the floors had a "converging checkerboard" look...it was an unending tunnel. Next, I realized that I felt no pain and that I had wondrous mobility and intelligence and peace. I looked downward and I saw a hospital bed? and I wondered as I looked at the figure in the bed -- if it was me? It didn`t look like me...it looked so very small! and I saw the room was full of doctors and nurses. I felt pity and sorrow for them -- as my sense of well being was overwhelming!

I saw my husband entering the front entrance to the hospital, and I saw him talking to a man at the elevator entrance in the lobby. I seemed to be moving "further away" and it seemed that I had some sense of direction. I was surrounded by the warmth of the most wonderful love I can ever describe and I felt that I was not alone. I felt that I was "speaking" without words. I felt exhausted.

I knew that I was going on to a new life or some new assignment. It seemed that I was "moving to the right" and traveling further and further toward my "new assignment". I was so intensely happy and secure basking in this sense of well being and intense love. The atmosphere of where I was did not seem new to me at all...I had no intention of ever leaving...and in a split second, I felt a "heaviness" and then excruciating pain through out my body.

I was aware that "I was back" and I also realized that I was indeed going to recover! I wanted to tell the persons working around my bed....I tried and tried...but I was too weak or unable to speak.

Immediately following this episode...I could hear them talking in ICU...and they told me that all my liver and urine reports were coming back normal. Previous to my collapse, my body was ridden with toxins and my urinary output had been only 1cc. per day. I finally returned home to my family after a total of 3 months hospitalization.

I was frail and weak...89 lbs. I was laying on a bed in our upstairs bedroom. I always needed help to get out of bed, but this day I was alone. I was laying on my back, so I tried to sit up forward, bracing myself on one arm. As I did, I looked over my shoulder to my pillow and realized that I had seemed to separate from my body...I was sitting forward...but I saw my body and head still resting on the pillow!! I immediately dropped backward onto my pillow!!! And, of course, stayed there until I could call out for help!!??

For many years I could not talk to anyone about my experiences...and when I tried I became very emotional and would begin to cry. But I am happy that now people have become more open with the NDE subject.

I am a RN, went back to work part time after a 1 year recovery and worked often in ICU or the ER and it seemed to me that patients in my care seemed to rest and generally do so much better when I was present for the shift.

I am a totally changed person since my NDE. I see life in a very spiritual way...and recognize that we are all indeed living spirits in the divine master plan of the universe. We are all living moving parts in the riddle of life!!!

Barbara:
beeclown@hotmail.com

  

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