I had a Liver Transplant.
I think what I experienced was a near death but not sure really, I know that everyone's experience is unique but mine seems unlike anyone else's, which makes me question it.
During September 2005, I was taken into hospital with multiple organ failure, within 12 hours or so I was placed in stasis (coma) on life support, my family were told I needed a liver transplant within 24 hours or I would die. Even though I was supposed to be completely unconscious I was aware of what was going on around me, just unable to speak or move. I remember the medical staff putting me on the ventilator and performing various procedures, the pain and discomfort was unbearable and seemed to go on for an eternity, what felt like days, the words torture and suffocation repeated in my head. I began to pray so hard, the next thing I remember I was sitting in an empty white room, pain gone, there was a door opposite me, I didn't feel inclined to go through, I just sat there, so happy. I couldn't believe it. I had prayed and been answered.
The next thing I remember is a lady had come to find me, she was upset, her son had died and she wanted me to find him for her, the memory is a bit vague, but I can see the child's face a toddler with blonde hair and blue eyes, I told his mother that he was fine, I don't remember anything else.
Then I was on top of the hospital, there was a castle up there. It was made of sand, it was solid but still fluid if you understand what I mean, the sands were fine and gold and they made a solid structure but were moving continuously. I seemed to be there for a long time, listening to music, it was beautiful, I remember thinking it was similar to Chopin, just piano. I danced around the castle, I felt totally light on my feet, weightless almost, and danced so elegantly (I'm not such an elegant dancer usually!), then I was painting and made sculptures, not with my hands but with my thought, they were made of gold and green sands, moving, alive. I can't describe to you how happy I was there.
The last thing I remember is sitting up in a bed in a white room, there was no colour, it was in black and white. The bed was surrounded by children, from different nationalities, they were on their knees with their hands clasped really tightly in front of their faces. They were praying for me to go home, I could hear them repeating 'please go home'.
I was unconscious for 9/10 days on life support, and it took me several days to come around after that as I was heavily drugged. I wish I remembered the sequence of events. When I eventually did come around I was euphoric, absolutely in love with everyone and everything, this state lasted for at least a week after I regained full consciousness. At the time I didn't know how severe my situation had been and I didn't know that I had died. The day I found out was the day the euphoria disappeared, I felt so sorry for my family and friends and the anguish they'd been through that I felt guilty for having been so happy.
I had received a liver transplant three days after I went onto life support, but before, during and after the operation, I had several cardiac arrests, my surgeon told me that the last one was six or seven hours after the transplant, when I had been stable and all my family had gone home. I was dead for 50 minutes, he said, at the very least 40. He told me how lucky I was to live, they wouldn't normally keep resuscitating a person after so long. I had received more stacked shocks than he had ever seen given; and suffered a swollen brain, and had been starved of oxygen for so long, so they felt it was likely I would be brain damaged. But I'm not! I made a very quick recovery considering, and am definitely a changed person as a result of the experience. I had leanings towards spirituality before, but now my life is dedicated to spirit and love.
I would obviously love to believe that my experience was mystical, and I absolutely did when I first came around, and lay there contemplating my realizations. But the mind has a way of questioning your own truths and doubt creeps in. I'd love to hear what anyone of you has to say about my experience, what you think it might have been?
Love jade x
(Your experience was spiritual, no doubt, a near death experience. That is the reason you are not brain damaged, and you are a changed person. Only a real spiritual experience can produce these results,)