A Near Death Experience, No. 13.

My NDE (not different, not the same, just mine)

Begging everyone's indulgence, but make of this what you will.

My NDE was the result of a high speed collision between my motorbike, and an illegally u-turning motor vehicle.

I was travelling along a straight road at a speed of approx. 85mph, I noticed a slow stream of traffic coming towards me (convoy fashion, I'm only assuming that there was a slow truck holding them up), as I reached about a third of the way past the convoy, one of the cars made an unannounced u-turn.

It was a very solid hit, . . . barrumph (can't think of an appropriate sound effect to describe the feeling), . . . I had a sensation of the beginnings of a long slow motion tumble, my first thought was (seriously) "oh shit, I'm dead, now what."

I must point out now, that this is the only time in the whole experience, that I can describe anything resembling a white light or tunnel. It seemed that the tumbling took place in a warm, soft white void.

Emerging from that void I was suddenly aware of being above the scene of the accident, I wasn't at all concerned about what had just happened. I seemed to just take it all in, my mind seemed . . . as I said earlier "my first thought was " . . . but, I now realise the thinking process was completely different, it was like every thought happened at once, all was resolved and my mind became uncluttered . . . hmmmm (that's the first time I've coined that phrase for it, but it seems appropriate). There was no BS left.

I did think about people I'd left behind, I just took it for granted that "they'd" understand soon enough themselves anyway. (I didn't think about my mum or my girlfriend per se, it was more of a collective thing).

The night was dark, but I could see very clearly, floating around tree top level, I wasn't aware of possesing a body, but seemed to still have binocular vision, it was the middle of winter, but I wasn't aware of the cold. I had everything I needed.

As far as "I" was concerned "I" had my freedom, I had no idea what was going to happen next, but I couldn't wait, I was on my way. There seemed no urgency about what was happening either, no deadlines, no time limits.

Then came the bummer, I snapped back inside my body. There I was again, self absorbed, whining, moaning . . . I was back amongst the bullshit.

The accident was a fairly traumatic event, the poor body got quite a violent shake, I sustained a broken neck out of the whole affair. Another strange thing though, as soon as I had my bearings again, I was able to calmly direct people as to how I should be treated (as a spinal injury), "don't move me" . . . "leave my helmet and scarf alone," etc.

I don't know how long I was gone, it was at least long enough for my body to have landed 45yds up the road, and a flurry of people to stir into action (I saw that much from my cosy little vantage point above the scene).

That was just a simple observation of my experience. I just don't know how to tell you how much it meant, how much of a reassurance it was to me.

I have no fear now of dying. I know there is no "death," I can only try and reassure you that "death" is not a thing to be feared.

Regards, JP


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